Prologue
I am just such a sucker for fantasy.
I wasn't really expecting to watch this movie. Why? I don't know. When I met Huda that day (16 Nov), I was thinking how we were going to spend the time. As it was a Friday, and since I had such a rough week at work, I thought I needed to relax and watch a movie and BEOWULF came to mind.
Chapter 1
I AM KING!
was the intro scene as Anthony Hopkins starred as King Hrothgar, ruler of the great hall of Heorot. His people was merry making and singing.
The King also has a draught (beautiful item) from which he drinks found-only-in-Heorot mead. He lavished praise on a brave warrior, Unferth (John Malkovich).
Meanwhile, his wife, the not-so-lovely Queen Wealtheow (Robin Wright Penn, is not a happy woman. She hasn't got laid yet because she knows her husband...
I won't spoil it.
Then Grendel (Crispin Glover), the first monster to appear in the movie, hideous-looking and all, decides to ravage Heorot because... Unferth chickened out and is not the brave warrior I thought he was.
Grendel then went back to the cave, with two (dead) men in his jaws, and starts talking gibberish (Old English) with his "MOTHOR" (a tentacle suggests an octopus-like monster)before he rests.
King Hrothgar, seeing the destruction, declares half his kingdom to the hero who will slay Grendel. Cue for...
Chapter 2
I AM BEOWULF!
was the next scene, as our hero (Ray Winstone) makes his way by sea together with his 14(?) men including trusted sidekick and advisor, Wiglaf, charmingly and wittingly potrayed by Brendan Gleeson.
Upon arrival, he was challenged by the jealous Unferth, who recounted a story of how the great Beowulf lost a swimming contest. Beowulf admits losing but it was only because he had slain 9 sea monsters (Wiglaf - "Last time it was 3"). Beowulf then slyly discloses a humiliating life story about Unferth, which he didn't dispute.
Beowulf then brought the main matter (Grendel) to the fore and the King was pleased that a hero has come to slain Grendel.
Later that night, a pre-celebration took place and Grendel wreaked havoc again. Beowulf's men died but ultimately, the (naked) hero prevailed and managed to heavily wound Grendel, who went back to his cave and "MOTHOR".
News was brought to King Hrothgar that Grendel was dead and more merry-making takes place. The Queen, on the King's instructions, presented Beowulf with the draught "Dragon-horn", which had a ruby on its neck where lay the soft spot of a dragon.
Wiglaf isn't pleased his fellow warriors had died and advised Beowulf that they must set sail at first tide on the morn. Beowulf understood and slept that night, haunted with visions of the Queen, whom he is in love with.
Chapter 3
I AM GRENDEL'S "MOTHOR" (Angelina Jolie, woof!! woof!!)
intro to next scene, as she wasn't at all pleased that Grendel was dead. She sent a message to Beowulf and the hall of Heorot, and toyed with Beowulf's dream by sending an hologram of the Queen in his sleep.
Wiglaf was on the way back to Heorot and discovered the hall hanging with the bodies Beowulf warriors. He saw Beowulf and both furiously met the King.
The King explained that he had thought that the mother will have long been gone but apparently she was still around. (Beowulf - "How many monsters do I have to kill? The mother, the father!") The King's reply to the last word was a sign...
Beowulf then decided to take on the mother. Unferth, apologetic at his previous unsightly conduct, gave him his heirloom sword "Hrunting" which Beowulf had at first deny but accepted after persuasion.
Chapter 4
BEOWULF vs MOTHER
as Beowulf and Wiglaf made their way to the Mother's lair with Hrunthing as company. After a comedic exchange of words, Beowulf proceeded to the lair alone. Upon entering the lair, his torch was snuffed out but Dragon-horn imbued the lair with light.
Beowulf issued a challenge and the Mother (Woof!! Woof!!) appeared. She then seduced Beowulf who succumbed and fornicated (this part is not in movie) with her and promised with ethereal promises, left Dragon-horn and the lair back to Heorot.
Falsely announcing the Mother was dead, the people of Heorot were delighted and again another celebration. The Queen had doubts. The King even more so, but he had devised a plan. He approached Beowulf about the true nature of the battle and with a smile, proclaimed that since has no heir, Beowulf will be King after his passing, and that the Queen and all people of Heorot will be his.
The King then carried out the last part of his plan...
Chapter 5
BEOWULF IS KING
and now sits commanding instead of battling. The Queen loves him but still does not want to get laid. So, Beowulf got someone else, quite cute girl.
Suddenly,the Dragon-horn returns and a new cycle of destruction takes place as a new monster menaced Heorot.
EPILOGUE
Beowulf told the Queen he has always loved her. Now, he battles the new monster. Being the hero, he will triumph, or did he?
REVIEW
I totally enjoyed the movie. I enjoyed the cast (and Jolie). It is one-dimensional and lacks depth and complexity but imagination really takes flight. Last words, the money spent on the ticket is worth it.
Sources:
Wikipedia: Beowulf
Wikipedia: Beowulf (movie)
